Thursday, April 23, 2009

It's Crazy, but It Just Makes Sense

I remember going to see Pope John Paul II in St. Louis when I was in college. I would have cancelled everything to have gone to see him. It was a great experience. I remember one religious sister sharing her vocation story at the youth gathering. She said the reason she entered religious life was because, "It just made sense." I still remember thinking, "She's crazy!" I was discerning religious life for myself at the time . . . secretly. In actuality, I was fighting it, and I was fighting pretty hard. I was putting up a really good fight.

Being called to religious life didn't make any sense to me. That is, until I became exhausted from fighting. I threw in the towel and opened myself up to the possibility. What I came to realize after reading, searching the Internet, visiting communities, and praying was that the life really did make sense. It makes sense to me now because this is where I am called. It fits well. I can imagine the people who hear or read my story are probably thinking what I once thought, "She's crazy!"

I don't claim to be "normal," whatever that is. I am blessed though. Blessed that I was graced with the openness to look into religious life and graced with the courage to have pursued it. Now I pray for the grace of perseverance to live my vows faithfully each and every day. It's not easy, and nuns are human. We're not granted special powers. And we're certainly not any different than anyone else.

I know the life I live and the things I do would not be possible without the grace of God. What I once thought was crazy, what I once fought hard to resist is now the life I live and love. I echo the words of the sister who spoke at the youth gathering many years ago, "It just makes sense."

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